The Life and Diary of David Brainerd

Title: The Life and Diary of David Brainerd
Editor: Jonathan Edwards
Publisher: Hendrickson, 2006
Pages: 371
Begun: May 3, 2009
Completed: August 21, 2009

The book is composed of two sections, Brainerd's personal, daily diary and his journal of evangelistic activity among the Indians to whom he ministered. Though only twenty-nine years old when he died of consumption (probably some type of respiratory disease), God worked through this man to make many disciples of Jesus among the Delaware Indians in New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Massachusetts. His diary speaks of his passionate love for God and the gospel which he gave his life to. But he also repeatedly writes of his "extreme vileness" (his favorite term to describe himself).

"I thought there was not one creature living so vile as I. Oh, my inward pollution! Oh, my guilt and shame before God! I know not what to do. Oh, I longed ardently to be cleansed and washed from the stains of inward pollution! Oh, to be made like God, or rather to be made fit for God to own!" (130)

This is the one concern that Edwards had for Brainerd as recorded in Edwards' preface to the diary: that Brainerd's low view of himself tended to go to its extremes to severe depression. It is true that many of Brainerd's entries indicate a deep depression that would last sometimes for weeks or months. There were days such as January 6, 1744 where he found relief by relishing in God's mercy:

"Feeling and considering my extreme weakness, and want of grace, the pollution of my soul, and danger of temptations on every side, I set apart this day for fasting and prayer, neither eating nor drinking from evening to evening, beseeching God to have mercy on me. My soul intensely longed, that the dreadful spots and stains of sin might be washed away from it. Saw something of the power and all-sufficiency of God. My soul seemed to rest on his power and grace; longed for resignation to his will, and mortification to all things here below. My mind was greatly fixed on divine things: my resolutions for a life of mortification, continual watchfulness, self-denial, seiousness, and devotion, were strong and fixed; my desires ardent and intense; my conscience tender, and afraid of every appearance of evil." (105-6)

Probably the most engaging section of his diary are the final months in which his life was slowly ebbing away. He was confined to his bed in the home of Jonathan Edwards while Jerusha, Edwards' daughter, cared for him. Brainerd admitted on his deathbed that he was finally able to take his focus off his vileness and to satisfy himself with Christ's righteousness.

"My heaven is to please God, and glorify him, and to give all to him, and to be wholly devoted to his glory: that is the heaven I long for; that is my religion, and that is my happiness, and always was ever since I suppose I had any true religion.....There is nothing in the world worth living for, but doing good and finishing God's work, doing the work that Christ did. I see nothing else in the world that can yield any satisfaction, besides living to God, pleasing him, and doing his whole will." (252)

Brainerd requested to Edwards that he be buried in Northampton, Massachusetts where Edwards' in-laws' (the Stoddards) remains lay. His request was honored. It was appropriate that a couple of years later, Jerusha Edwards (who also succumbed to consumption) was laid to rest next to Brainerd's grave. An attachment had developed between them while Brainerd was confined to bed. Brainerd's entries hint at this and Jonathan Edwards confirms this.

An excellent and highly recommended read.